Remember Merv? I think he and David should meet each other.
Disclaimer: This post is grossly NSFW.
Disclaimer 2: Don't try to gross out people on the internet, because they will beat you.
There is nothing attractive to me (and most people, I believe) about pooping. And even less about telling some rando on the interwebs that you're pooping. But just my luck, I happened to say this to someone who was an outlier.