As far as I know, this person is in jail now.

 

Later on in conversation, he hadn't given up yet, so I gave in and took things to a new level. I mean, it's not every day a guy offers this kind of special treatment:

And now, no more account. I hear they discontinue your account automatically when you're arrested for soliciting.

I don't think he said it out loud to himself...

Or, you know, maybe he did, and that's why he likes it.

Turns out I know this person in real life.

I didn't know it at the time, but it turns out that's my best friend from high school's boyfriend. She was inspired by the blog and made her own profile to mess with people, and then he made a profile to mess with her. And decided to message me at some point down the line.

I really can't believe I didn't use this one sooner

It was just an objective fact, really.

A rather mean friend of mine tells me that my ability to be incredibly objective towards people makes me shallow, full of myself, and callous. The callous part I'll accept, but I see nothing particularly shallow or self-inflating in being objective. Apparently this guy is with my friend, though.

[Said friend, I know you'll eventually read this. You're a mean friend. Deal with it.]

Apparently I've been employing the wrong tactics

With this guy, at least. I started with the basic girl-rapist line, after a terrible pick-up line on his end:

Which, of course, did not deter him. We later got into my extreme stupidity about not particularly modern technology:

But he was a trooper. So I moved on to gold digging, formerly having a penis, AND the implication of death.

But no! Still not scared away! And now we're in weird backstory and ambiguous genitalia land.

Which is why am I just seriously confused that the line that finally got him to give up was this one:

That's right, folks. Apparently you can be the craziest mofo who ever roamed the earth, ambiguous genitalia and all, and it's all good. But if you hate music, stay the hell away.

This completely changes my outlook on some people.

I'm back!

For a while there, k-mart had no internet. And so, I am now back, and will resume posting. Probably not every day anymore, because frankly, I get tired a lot now, and I just don't feel like spending much time on this anymore. But there will still be updates, probably at least every other day. Starting tomorrow.

People with jobs and/or lives do not make good bloggers.