I might have actually started to feel bad about these.

I don't often feel bad about any of the amusing but potentially awful things I do, but these two guys made my dormant conscience start to rustle in its sleep.

Guy #1 was just such an easy target. Honestly, I know sarcasm can be hard to pick up on when only seen in text, but I thought it was glaringly obvious in this case. As I so often have been on OkCupcakes, I was wrong.

I had no idea how to dig myself out of this hole, so I took a cop-out. I brought back little Ashley's stepfather.

Guy #2 might be the most gullible person on the internet, but he was still nice and polite, and I just can't really fault him too much because of it. It's possible that my standards are being lowered by this whole thing. Before reading, it's important to know that in my main picture, my hair is quite obnoxiously and not naturally red.

I actually just like the way I answered this question, is all.

Also, being serious about this is a very effective way to scare people away, I've found.

I can't make this shit up.

Okay, I totally can, and I do. But I swear I did not make this one up. This guy is actually legit, and that scares me.

Yeah. I'd hate to be that guy's "cousin sister."

What not to do when dealing with underaged girls

I decided to try implying that I was still in high school to a few people. I have varied responses, which I'll probably get around to posting at some point, but there are two that I'd like to use as examples. To any guys who read this blog and use online dating for real - if a girl implies that she is still in high school, and therefore likely underage or extremely close to it, there are two ways to respond. First:

See what this guy did? He asked a question to confirm his suspicions, and then he walked away. This is the correct response. Now, we'll move on to the incorrect response:

Strong enough yet?

So then, of course, I had to go a little farther. For science, and all.

Yep. Tomorrow we'll get into what happens when little Ashleigh's stepfather finds her online dating account open on her computer and takes it away until she learns to stop being such a skank bitch whore like her mother. For real, it's coming in another post, I promise.